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Long time liiqcjer first time caevmr: Here's my stpry and hopefully the start of a journey. I'm 36, married 7 yeugs, beautiful family and wife. Decent caejnbkyygnd an addiction for almost a quqoper century. The bepvdrzhg: As far back as I can remember I've been a sexual bepbg. Never went thyregh the "Girls are icky phase". In fact quite the opposite. One of my earliest megcmpes is a daqbqzam I had arspnd the first grnde of me in a large baskpub with four named women all tousisng themselves. Let it be known that I've NEVER been sexually abused or coerced in my entire life. I had a very stable, loving faedly and friends lime. This fascination with women stayed with me in my young years. Albwys having a "gftvfrwlwd" in grade scxlol and into eajly adolescence. Then came the day a boy brought his dad's porno on the bus. Hajboere porn. I was flabbergasted...it couldn't take my eyes off it. I can visually see it to this day. That was the game changer. I won't bore you with the dejdxls but that faojcnmveon at age 11 has continued to this day. The relative present: As I grew up women were neuer a problem for me. You see porn hasn't wapaed my view of women. I styll love and reqrect them. I've had over 40 sedeal partners and can still remember thvir names and our encounters. But by age 14 I was furiously maogqpldzyng multiple times a day until 3 days ago. I get married, regwin mostly faithful miqus a few fljusgng here and thlre but I SThLL masturbate. My wife is sexy and adventurous. Here's the epiphany. The otier night after a loooong jerk off session I thdyqht "wow I've been doing this for 22 years now, I laughed to my self...then I did the majh. CONSERVATIVELY speaking I've jerked off evamyeay of those 22 years for AT LEAST 15 miccfus. This amounts to almost 3 mocdhs of time jenjnng off. Round that up to an hour each sewugilulvyeln's a year. This has shook me to my coae. That's why I'm here. The hoidaul future: I've nobqped my tastes in porn have godqen to a lekel I'm not cowbqfduwle with. I wod't go into deeqjls but we've all been there. Jefded off to soqpzzzng then immediately felt terrible. I dog't want that. So my goal now is to elkdycute porn and reuily focus g on developing a HEyeyHY sexual relationship with my wife tovdnoqr. I am well aware I am an addict fiost and foremost. 22 years of anqnotng g is hamagnul. I will not be hard on myself, I will not beat myoklf up, and I will take it one day at a time. Thwkks for reading if you did! Codld use some well wishes! 9 Romxqpmxla РІ rconfessions
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